Circa 2000

Just some days back i'd to babysit some of the neighbourhood kids while their moms celebrated Makar Sankranti. I decided to pass the time giving them some 'gyan' from Panchatantra, Aesop's Fables and all such stories with a moral (What's happened to me??).

Here is a succinct summary of the storytelling session I had. To cut long stories short (pun intended) I have only mentioned the various fables I told them while detailing their comments. You must remember that all of my audience was between 4-7 years of age.

The story of the hare and tortoise

"We've heard of this story before. Its so idiotic! Y didn't the tortoise wear skates like in Dhoom2??"

"I don't know dear. Ok I'll tell u all another story."

The story of the thirsty crow

"Yuck who wants to drink water with stones in it?? He should have used a straw, shouldn't he didi??"

"Well yea maybe he shud hav. Donno y he did't. Ok this story I bet u dont know atall."

The story of the talkative tortoise

"But y did they hold the tortoise on a stick?? They could have made a swing from some big leaves like banana leaves and the tortoise could sit in it!"

"I guess they could have done that. Um ok listen to this one its a very good story."

The story of the fox and the grapes

"Shee!! He could have brought grapes from Food Bazar! My mom always gets grapes there in any season!"

"There wasnt Food Bazar in the jungle idiot. But he could have stood up on a big stone na didi?"

"I suppose so. I wasn't there to find out y he didn't! Ok i'll tell u one more story!"

The story of hidden treasure

"Kya didi??! Didn't those ppl have metal detectors to find treasure? They wudn't have to dig up the field then!"

"What year did u say the stories wer written?"

"Very very long ago dear. When animals could talk."

"Then they are very old now. We should have new exciting stories with computers and mobile phones in it! Can u tell us some of those?"

"Not today. I'll find u some like those and tell u some other time"

End of storytelling session. Confused me (Should I become more techno-savyy or should Aesop brush up on his tech-skills??). Excited Kids ("Didi tells even older stories than granny!"). Maybe I'll tell them a spoofed version of Merchant of Venice or Cinderella suitable for 21st century. Maybe they r ready for Sidney Sheldon already!!

Are the animals of Panchatantra forests listening? Pls apply to me next time u r in some difficulty. I know some very smart kids who'll email u the solution or scrap it to u on Orkut!!!

Pen or Sword??

Std I : "You should have written a simple essay on dogs. Who told you to write about Janjeer the police dog who discovered RDX??"

Std IV : "Dear you must write only a 15 line essay. Don't write more than the printed lines on the paper"

Std VII : "Your unforgettable journey was a walk in your building?? Write this again please"

Std IX : "Please choose some universally acceptable person for the person you admire the most. Peter Pan is hardly someone to write about"

SSC Board Exams : "You write very well but remember you are giving your board exam. Stick to the pattern. Don't write like you are writing a thriller story."

HSC Board Exams : "I think you should read some essay books and pick up their style. Yours is...rebellious"

Engineering Communication Skills (CS) : "Write briefly and to the point. Use minimum words and dont describe more than you have to."

GRE Writing : "You aren't writing a blog for them. Write in the established pattern and template."

Does this look like I've been suppressed in my writing throughout my academic career? Oh no, these were the comments I got before every major exam. The year-end finals, the boards, the sem exams and now the GRE. Listen to what these same people said otherwise when I wrote for pleasure.

Std I : "I'm gonna send your review about Enid Blyton's books to the school magazine"

Std IV : "Everyone please listen to me. I have a short story from Chaitali here that won the first prize at a story writing competition. Its really good."

Std VII : "Chaitali's won the first prize in an essay writing competition! The essay is very well written and very different!"

Std IX : "So many articles in Marian Notes??!! All the English teachers like your writing!"

SSC : "You will be on the editorial team for Marian Notes this year."

HSC : "Will you be editor for the science-club's newsletter?"

Engineering : "You will head the magazine committee for Innovate'06."

Preparing for GRE : "Chait your writing style is excellent! I really like it!"

Don't think I'm boasting or complaining will you? But it makes me wonder sometimes. If without the pressures of an examination everyone likes and appreciates my writing then why don't the examiners do the same?

Why do I have to suppress my thoughts and stifle my creativity? Why must I don a dowdy cloak of tried and tested writing when I know that beneath it I wear a resplendent original gown? Is something wrong with my writing or is it the examination system at fault?

Perhaps its the way in which we look at exams that is at fault. If only I were allowed to write without caring for marks there too perhaps I'd be able to retain my individuality and character. Nevertheless I wonder...should I have picked a sword instead of the pen early in life??

I settled for a keyboard instead and turned to blogging!!

Time turner...to the past and back!

Wednesday, June 23, 2004

Today was the day when I thought I'd be a worthy citizen of India!! I went to get my name enrolled in the voting list. This is where you can play 'passing the parcel' for hours!! The first trip was to the local post office. 2 aunties were chatting in there about latest happenings in the life of Jassi. Angry at being interrupted they directed me to another counter. Here the man was slower than the action replays they show for cricket. Anyways I managed to get my form.

Next back home I rushed to get the form filled and collect the required documents. Surprise!! Surprise!! I'm still 2 years old on our ration card. Mom & Dad's election cards show their pics like someone on India's Most Wanted! Anyways I manage to get everything ready and its off to the municipal school to submit the form.

Ohh Oh!! I have landed in a class full of students singing 'Hum ko man ki shakti de na!!' Where the hell do I give this form?? Its been an hr since I'm in this school trying to find where to submit this. Atlast a Good Samaritan to the rescue!! I meet a man who directs me to the right class to submit my form.

And after all this running around the form-taker tells me 'Tumchya ghari aale aaste na naav ghayla' - We would have come to your house to take your name!! As if he's talking about Pizza Hut's home delivery. Talk about door-to-door service! And a look at the post office and the form submission office makes me wonder ... what happened to paperless offices? and is india shinning with shelves of dusty files??

So till my name really comes in the voting list...its a long wait...will keep you all posted.

An entry from my old blog. The day I first registered myself for voting! The day holds a lot of significance for me ofcourse but today I'll also mark it as the day my disillusionment with India's political system began. The black dot that all voters get on their forefinger was what I'd eagerly waited to get since I started studying civics. Today it doesn't hold that much significance!

This post is not to discredit our politicians (they are past that level!) . Rather I posted it only after I realised the power of blogs to influence netizens. It was only recently that i discovered that you can still vote with an option equivalent to "none of the above" in multiple choice tests.

Since I'm averse to plagiarism (except when it applies to assignments and projects...hehe) I'll jus post a link to a detailed article explaining Section 49-O. Do use it if you think none of the candidates in an election you vote are worthy of your vote!!

Article explaining Section 49-O

Do disregard the comments on the link since the information about the right of not voting is accurate to the best of my knowledge!

FWD::

I'm wary of any email that contains this as part of its subject! Hey I didn't say I delete all those in this kind! Most of them r irritating like asking for donations for some child suffering from a rare disease like 'exam fever' or claiming to share Bill Gate's fortune with u (pls how naive can ppl be!!). But some r good...i mean really good.

Planning to make a collection of some good fwds i've received. Will keep putting them up on this post as they come. So all those who read this pls contribute for my collection with good fwds. P.S. I mean GOOD fwds only...i dont hav time to make 100s of wishes b4 sending chain emails!!!

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1. What is confidence????

A hypothetical situation where 20 CEOs board an airplane and are told that the flight that they are about to take is the first-ever to feature pilotless technology: It is an uncrewed aircraft.

Each one of the CEOs is then told, privately, that their company's software is running the aircraft's automatic pilot system. Nineteen of the CEOs promptly leave the aircraft, each offering a different type of excuse.

One CEO alone remains on board the jet, seeming very calm indeed. Asked why he is so confident in this first uncrewed flight, he replies : "If it is the same software that runs my company's IT systems, this plane won't even take off." !!!!

That is called Confidence!!!

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2. Life is like Coffee

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university Professor.

Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.

Offering his guests coffee, the Prof. went to the kitchen and returned
with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups: porcelain,
plastic, glass, some plain-looking and some expensive and exquisite, telling them to help themselves to hot coffee.

When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the Prof. said "If you noticed, all the nice-looking, expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is but normal
for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your
problems and stress. That all of you really wanted was coffee, not the
cup, but you consciously went for the better cups and are eyeing each other's cups."

"Now, if Life is coffee, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, but the quality of Life doesn't change. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee in it."

So friend, don't let the cups drive you...enjoy the coffee instead.

'e' vs. me!

The world is going electronic with a capital 'E' (the caps is jus to 'e'mphasize the 'e'mergence of this trend. Otherwise we write it small)!! And every word in 'E'nglish is scrambling to get the coveted letter b4 itself. We have e-mail, e-shopping, e-cards, e-books...and some 'e- ' words not suitable to be listed here :)

In between all this melee are 'e-games'. U name the real thing and there is an e-game for it in cyberspace! From chess to scrabble to tetris and even the humble tic tac toe! No, no don't get me wrong!! I'm not against computer games. I've had my share of playing Solitaire and many other games on the comp and I even agree that some of these are easier played on the comp (wat with the strength indicator and direction pointer in yahoo pool!).

Even so I cannot forget my childhood summer and diwali vacations at granny's place. Seated on the house terrace in the afternoons with a jug of homemade lemonade and a bowl of popcorns (not microwaved!) we matched wits on chess or scrabble or wooed lady luck at blackjack or rummy.

I still remember the squeals of excitement at climbing a ladder in snakes & ladders or reaching HOME in ludo and the cries of dismay at becoming bankrupt or landing in jail at monopoly. It was a different feeling to hold the dice in your hands and give them a good hard shake b4 casting them. The click of a mouse to cast dice in an e-game is not the same. Same goes for shuffling cards (its fun to show off if u r a deft shuffler!)

The disparity doesn't stop here. Sure its easier to keep time in e-chess but there its just u vs. the computer or a faceless unknown person. It lacks the enthusiasm that a band of cheering supporting cousins can offer and also the criticism and jeering that the opponent's supporters give. When we played chess it was never a one-to-one game. One 'real' game turned itself into a group game due to the sheer experience touching the pieces before u moved them. Dont think I'm violent will u...but i cant describe the satisfaction of 'knocking' off the opponent's knight (or any other chess piece) when u captured it!

It wasn't only the thrill of winning or the fun of playing with friends or cousins. The cheating in card games and the sulking when losing a game and abandoning it was also unique. There were moments of extreme frustration when someone overturned the carrom board or tore away the tic tac toe paperbcos defeat was too much for them! But they serve to support my stance!!

And my stance here is it is not always profitable to add an 'e' to everything. Some things are best enjoyed the way they are!! Sit for a game of dumb charades or trivia with ur family once and u'll kno wat i mean. Btw did i mention that the winner's prize was almost always a nice chocolatey Cornetto or a large bar of Fruit & Nut??